It's been cold. The weather is strange with flurries of snow, then nothing. Right now it looks like we could run out in our shorts with the sun shining and the grass showing. That would be foolish, however, because it's only 32 degrees. This seems like a heat wave for my Alaskans, but it's still cold.
My kids have been showing signs of cooped up-itis. You know the symptoms: restlessness, whining, complaining, staring out the window, asking over and over when snack is, telling me they're bored when we just finished something fun, fighting with each other, arguing about anything, and I'm pretty sure their eyes are glossing over. It doesn't help that we've been sick and so have our friends. The pretending only lasts so long when one is a toddler with a fairly short attention span. They all have good imaginations though, I will say that. A few of the stories that have come out of our time inside are as follows...
Peter and John decided they were crabs caught in the pot.
Ella in her pirate attire. Complete with my belt, a keychain, a wooden gun, and a foam sword.
Peter in his jams with a wooden gun and a plastic pin and his jet. Not sure what he was doing here, he was singing pirate songs and flying planes.
While these are funny pictures and we have had good times playing, the past few weeks have been filled with BEHAVIOR LOWS. Mine included. Not sure why I'm so short fused, but it's bad. I started my bible study on James last week. I told Andrew that whenever I start a bible study, my life seems to test every bit of whatever it is I'm studying. James happens to be filled with all manner of life instructions and most of them are the ones I struggle most with. Controlling my temper, taming my tongue, acting in a Christ like manner even when it's not deserved. If those don't describe my downfalls I don't know what does. With the kids being cooped up and my temper being short, I have had to ask for their forgiveness more than I care to this week.
Ella broke my favorite owl this with a super bouncy sky ball right after I asked her not to bounce stuff in the kitchen. I yelled really loud (not words, just like a barbarian, yelled) and she went running off saying, "Why do you have so much fragile stuff?? I'm so sorry!!" If that wasn't enough to make me feel bad and mad at the same time, John came around the corner and said in his tiny voice, "Mommy, you swarred me!" I scare myself sometimes kid. I cleaned it all up and went and had a long talk with her about how she disobeyed and how I reacted badly. That was Sunday.
Monday I tried to get a little more under control and behave better in the hopes that my kids would catch on. We played with friends and had a nap. So far so good. By that night, they had complained about dinner, Peter threw an all out on the floor screaming like crazy fit about sharing a bite of his popsicle with his brother who had just given him an oreo (since they ate their "yucky" dinner), and I totally forgot to take them to swimming lessons. In tears that night I decided Andrew and I needed a better plan of attack. This plan includes (may be obvious) the fact that we need to collaborate before punishing. Making said child sit and wait while we talk about how to deal with it instead of just spelling out the consequence with the other one being confused about the severity. Making the child tell us why it is they are in trouble. Talking about what the Bible says regarding their stinkin' poor behavior. Hopefully these things will help. Speaking of help...
There has been little around here. I mean when I say, "Let's help pick up, let's help each other get his done." What they hear is, "Oh yeah! I can't wait to clean up another mess I didn't make and had nothing to do with!" I tried putting stuff in the basement. I tried taking it away. They don't care. It's a total back fire. Tuesday I spent 3 hours in my room cleaning while the kids rested then watched a movie on the computer in there. I was sitting on the floor staring at my wardrobe when Peter looked over and asked, "Are you tired mom?" What I wanted to say was, "What was your first clue?" but I just said, "yes."
He hopped up and said, "I love you," and gave me a hug. You see, it's these redeeming factors that keep me going.
His sister decided later that night when it was time to pick her room up to just climb into bed. "The Brothers" had helped and were done. While I stood there looking at the disaster she'd created I said, "You need to hop up and help me so this goes fast and since I didn't pull out a single one of these things." She sits up and looks me right in the eye and says, "Mom, it's fine. Look, there's a path right to my bed from the door." I almost choked. My reaction while my blood pressure is rising, "What in the world? Are you in high school or something?" She said, "no, I'm in preschool." AHHH! I get no where. I told her she needed to help me and she refused, but ever so calmly. I started cleaning up while I thought of a punishment. Ah ha. "Ella, you are not allowed to play in here at all tomorrow and maybe the next day. Not until I get up the energy to want to clean all your junk up for you again. Or you decide to be a helper." This actually hit a sore spot because she likes to hang out and play in there instead of nap some days. She didn't care last night, but today, when she had to nap in my room and couldn't take any toy out of her room she was sad. I said, "There is a reason why you cannot go in your room." She knew. Right now I sorta feel like I'm one up, but I know that won't last long. You might wonder why it is I make such a big deal out of cleaning up. I don't like mess. My parents would say I was not always like this, and for that I am sorry. It changed with college and sharing space with others. I want my kids to know about helping, putting things away, being responsible...we were taught as kids to leave something better than when you found it. Maybe someday this will pay off. Sometimes I feel like I'm keeping score with my kids. Mom 1 Kids 0. I don't like this about I approach battles when I've had enough. We should all be working together. A team. A family. It's just one more goal we are working toward right now.
If you have things that work for you I'd love to hear them regarding getting kids to help.
